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John Lewis Christmas Ad – how to annoy a nation of dog lovers!

I never cease to be amazed by the seeming stupidity of highly paid people!

Do you know what I mean? A public figure: politician/celebrity/business leader, whatever, says something and suddenly the rest of us realise that this guy is a complete, not to put to fine a point on it, ‘twit‘!

Yesterday for example Lord Young, a Conservative peer of the realm, chose to let the British public know ( in this financial meltdown climate) that they’ve, “…never had it so good” – admittedly I suspect his Lordship had had more than a few glasses of a rather good claret before he began to expound on why the Brits, in general, were a bunch of ignorant ingrates and any forthcoming cuts, job losses etc. were not really all that much to be concerned about.

Hey Ho! Let them eat cake!

Similarly in the “WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?” category come the geniuses who either created, directed, paid for or approved the latest John Lewis Christmas Television Advert – would you agree that the ending might benefit from a re-think?

So here’s the way it went, presumably, in the ‘brain storming session’ that preceded the filming of the John Lewis Christmas Ad, 2010 which ends with a sad dog left outside in the snow…


JONAS: Did you know that men are CRAP at wrapping presents? Let’s get lot’s of videos of STUPID men wrapping presents BADLY!

DANIEL: Brilliant! Let’s have three of them…

  • One idiot trying to wrap a candelabra with the candles still in
  • A second clown wrapping a handbag so it LOOKS like a handbag
  • Another fool wrapping a teapot – but he’s at work and he’s a mechanic so his hands are bound to be, like, really oily right?

JOSH: I like that but let’s have the teapot guy tell his fellow mechanic not to touch the wrapping process ‘cos he might dirty the wrapping paper because his mate has dirty hands?

JONAS: Loving it! Men are really stupid! The women will love that! This is groundbreaking stuff guys!

DANIEL: I’m a bit worried that there’s no irony in there chaps – it’s kind of expected if this ad is going to win an award!!!

JOSH/JONAS: Yup, yup – any ideas?

DANIEL: Little girl? Backseat of car? Badly wrapped watering can? Pissing down with rain outside? Ironic right?

JONAS: THAT, Tim is why you are paid £150k before bonuses – bloody brilliant!

TIM: OK let’s wrap it up with a final chrismassy theme. Anyone?

JOSH: Little boy comes out of the house on Christmas Eve, in his jimjams, to pin a stocking above his dog’s kennel?

DANIEL: Aah, nice! Lot’s of snow…

JOSH: The house would be way out in the countryside somewhere, next to a lake maybe. Cosy and warm! Christmas cheer shining through the windows. Dog left outside in the snow blown kennel gazing longingly at the lights of the house and dreaming of the warmth and good cheer therein… Christmas lights on the kennel?

JONAS: OK I’m happy with that let’s get the artwork ready for a presentation to the client tomorrow – where can we do that?

DANIEL: Le Gasboche has a small ante-room that we can use for aperitifs and a presentation before we go in for the full 20 course menu dégustation in the private dining room – we use it for general Grand Prix sponsorship entertaining if you recall? Lord Young recommends it apparently.

ALL: Excellent!

But they leave the dog out in the cold? What were they thinking!

No wonder dog lovers around the country are up in arms!

Here’s my ‘suggested’ version of the video –

PS: @John Lewis, feel free to use my alternate ending as a little bird is telling me that you will be changing your video soon, the annoyed outcry of dog lovers will only increase AND please go easy on the guy that actually thought the original ad was a good one – presumably he’s a ‘cat’ person, and nothing wrong with that!

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